DUSTING OFF THE SHOES...STARTING....AGAIN

Well, on this day one year ago I set a goal to finish a marathon. I was excited! I was enthusiastic! I was hopeful!....I was naive! 

Naive? Yes....naive. I thought my overweight, non-exercising self could just jump from the couch to being a runner. Through a terrible ankle and knee injury, I was humbled and reminded that I just may need to take things slower, with more realistic expectations.

After hurting myself while jogging in August of last year, I decided to give myself LOTS of time to heal before I started again. I was planning to start training for a marathon again in January, but honestly, fear set in. I was afraid of re-injuring myself! So, I did nothing. Inspiring, huh? :)

I decided to give myself some grace and give myself until today to finish attending my pity party. Why today? Today was the L.A. Marathon...the day I hoped to be completing a marathon. 

So this is it. I am starting again. I turn 40 in a few months and WILL complete a marathon when am in my new decade. I really don't care if end up walking most of the marathon one year from now. I know I need to be realistic. I think it would be great if I can run at least half of it, but will see how my body decides to cooperate with me. I just know one way or another, God-willing, I will complete the LA Marathon one year from today. Running.Walking. Crawling. Whatever.

During my 40th year on this planet, I plan to do 40 things I have never done before. I am seeing "completing a marathon" as a very fun highlight to add to the year!

So, here I am dusting off my shoes....and this time I am going to take things slowly....very, very slowly. Slow and steady will win the race...or at least finish the race.

PRAY FOR ME...SERIOUSLY...

Today is Wednesday. 

This past Sunday I was so excited to begin my "Couch to 5K" program again....not excited to start over, but excited that I was finally back to feeling 100% after being sick and hurting my back. 

My two oldest kids ran with me to help celebrate the new start. The run was a bit tough, but no where near as hard as the first time I started the C25K program. I did not feel like I was going to die and I was happy! Here is a pic we took after we finished...

Yesterday, Tuesday, was Day 2 of Week 1 in the C25K program. My daughters (ages 6 and 9) wanted to run with me, so I said, "Sure"! Great bonding time, right? Well, my youngest daughter got a cramp right after the 5-minute brisk walk warm-up and we had to turn back to take her home. Bummer. 

My oldest daughter and I continued on. It was a tough run because of my stamina and the fact we ate a large dinner full of delicious Ethiopian food about an hour before the run. I thought it would be no problem though...I would just push through. Little did I know things were about to take a HUGE turn for the worse...

Just after our 1/2 way mark, we were jogging along and all of a sudden, for no apparent reason, I twisted my ankle and literally went crashing to the sidewalk. Pain. Pain. Pain shot through my ankle. For a moment I thought I had broken it. I sat up in tears and sat on the lawn of the person's house I fell in front of. I was whimpering and praying, "Oh Jesus, help me. Help me." When I fell, I managed to keep hanging on to the leash of my dog and my phone. The pain was excruciating and it took me a few moments to catch my breath and my barings. My poor daughter stood looking at me, not sure what to do. My husband and oldest son are out of town on a camping trip, so I had to call my Mom (who also lives with us) to pick me up. I did not know the name of the street we were on, so my oldest daughter ran to the corner to to get the name so I could give it to my mom. She was so composed, and while we waited for my mom to arrive she asked to pray for me....She is awesome like that.

Getting up off the ground was so difficult, but I had to do it. I was able to put some pressure on my right foot, but it was extremely painful. My mom arrived (with my youngest kids in the car) within a few minutes stressed and worried. She knew if I had to call for a ride, it had to be bad. My oldest daughter, my dog, and I got into the car and headed home. 

My mom wanted to take me to the E.R., but I refused. She wanted to call my husband, but I told her not to. He and my oldest son are having a wonderful trip and I do not want to ruin it. So, at home, my mom got me the only pair of crutches we had...a child's pair. They were not terribly helpful, but they helped me to not put quite so much pressure on my right foot while I got into the house. 

We got in, and I immediately sat on the couch (back to the couch again!) and elevated my foot. When I took off my shoe and sock, this is what I found...

It was actually worse than I thought! I spent the entire night icing my ankle. I even slept on the couch icing it. I got very little sleep, but I was doing my best to keep the ankle iced and elevated. 

At about 5am this morning, I had to get up and use the restroom.  I was able to get to the bathroom and back, using the child-sized crutches. I always wanted to be taller, but this morning, I was thankful I am only 5'2".

I took a good look at my ankle and after about 10 hours of ice, the bruising was not bad, but the ankle was still very swollen and very painful. My left knee is also very sore and scraped...I think I landed on it when I fell.

My husband and son will be home in a couple of hours (they are on the road now), and I will tell them what happened when they get home. I probably need to go it to have x-rays taken when they get home. 

I cried my eyes out when I got home last night.....not only from the pain, but from the complete and total sadness that after only 1.5 days back running, I am out of commission again for who knows how long.

I knew this journey would be tough, but I am exasperated. I am beyond frsutrated. I am doubting if I will ever get it together enough to be able to train to run a marathon. I believe at this point, L.A. Marathon 2015, is not an option. I am okay with postponing a year, but am also disappointed. At this point, it feels like evil forces are working against me. 

I will not give up though. I WILL NOT.

Pray for me, would ya?

THE COLOR RUN

With all of the issues I have been having lately, I was almost disappointed that I signed our family up for the Color Run (www.thecolorrun.com) this past Saturday. I did not think I would be able to get as much as I wanted to out of my first 5K. I prayed a ton the week before the run for healing of the pain in my back (or at least that I would be able to walk the race and not be in agony). I considered not going to the event, but my kids were so excited, I just did not have it in me not to go.

So, I prayed Friday night before I went to bed, and hoped for the best for Saturday. Saturday morning I woke up and was so thankful that I was only having some stiffness in my back. The sharp pain seemed to be gone!

We went to the event and...it was one of the BEST things we have done as a family! It was so much fun to start off all clean and in mostly white clothing....

and run through blue....

and pink....

and orange...

and purple...

and yellow! 

At the end, we were COVERED from head to toe in a marbling of color.

The kids had a blast jumping through color clouds, rolling on the ground through color, taking handfuls of the powder paint and dumping it on themselves and each other....even Daddy attempted to make a "paint angel" (like a snow angel) at the "orange" station. 

We giggled. We danced. We were silly. We laughed. We smiled. We stayed together. And...we made great memories.

What about the running? Well, based on my back pain, I did not think I would run any of the race and would be happy to walk the event. However, I think my adrenaline kicked in (or I was delirious with excitement) because I felt good enough to run a bit in short stretches. It was a pretty warm day, so my youngest kids (both age 6) were not "into" the idea of running much anyway. Why run....when you can go slow and play in paint!?!? But, together as a family (holding hands through much of the event), we ran over a mile of the 5K! 

Considering all that I am going through physically....I call that a HUGE success!!!

It is now Monday. I have taken 3 showers and spent some time in the pool...and my skin is still not color-free. I am wearing my COLOR RUN stained skin with pride! Although, at this point, it looks more like I was beaten up...the blue-green "bruise" color from the race is the one that seems to be lingering the most! 

TANTRUM!

I don't know what happened to my body after completing the "Couch to 5K" program, but I have completely fallen apart! I came down with a terrible cough/cold/infection a few days after I finished the program. After doing my best to "tough it out" (if at all possible, I don't go to doctors or take any medications....read my previous posts on my stubbornness), I ended up going to the doctor and needed 5 days of antibiotics to get myself heading in the right direction again. Well, I was "better" for about a week (and got a few runs in), but have been fighting the cough again for almost 2 weeks! I just can't shake it. AND....to top it off, I tweaked my back a week ago and have not been able to bend without pain since. I have never "tweaked" my back like this. What the heck is happening to me?!?!

I am frustrated.

I am disappointed.

I am sad.

I put so much effort and energy...and consistency, into getting to a place where I could run 2-3 miles....and now I feel like I am losing it all.

I am wondering if I pushed myself too hard during the 8 weeks of the C25K program. Was it too much to go from not exercising regularly in 20 years and being very overweight, to running every other day and pushing myself to further and further distances on most runs? 

Is my body freaking out?!?! Does my body think we are doing a "5K to Couch" program???

I don't know. I just know that people have told me that "I need to listen to my body", and apparently right now my body is throwing a tantrum.

And I don't like it one bit!

"SO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW?"

After finishing my C25K training, there has been one question I have been asked regularly...

"So, what are you doing now?"

I have only run two times since coming off of a sixteen day sickness break (after completing C25K). So, honestly....I don't know what I am doing now! Ha! Here is what my plan is...for now...

I want to get to a place where I am running 2 miles at a faster pace. Why two miles? I don't know...because I like even numbers? Because three miles seem like too much (I survived a 3 mile run at the end of C25K, but it was fairly torturous) and one mile seems too little?

Two sounds right...I have 2 feet to carry me as a run, 2 ears to listen to music as I run, 2 eyes to watch as a run (actually four-eyes if you want to tease me about wearing glasses), 2 x 2 = the number of children I have. 

Two. It's a good number. 

In addition to running 2 miles faster, I am also making sure I run for a minimum of 20 minutes. During C25K, the app assumed I ran a 10-minute mile. So, in my desire to run 2 miles faster, I need to get it under 20 minutes, but even if I do that, I am going to continue to run past the 2 mile mark to finish a 20 minute run. I figure that way, I am increasing my speed and distance. So, "2"night I ran my 2 miles and did my best to push myself to run as fast as possible.*

*Please know my general running speed is a pitifully slow jog....some may even call it a fast walk.

So, I did it. I pushed myself to increase my speed, and did well! I covered more ground than I usually do in a 20 minute window, and got a good workout. 

I want to get to a place where I feel "comfortable" running. Is that bad? I could just keep increasing my distance. I have the "5K to 10K" app ready-and-waiting, but every time I increase the distance when I run I feel like I am suffering. I am suffering a lot on this journey so far (I started off on the couch after all). I just want to feel a little, itty, bitty, bit comfortable while running. I long for that feeling. I think to keep going long-term on this running journey, I "need" to feel that...even if it's only occasionally.

So, that is what I am doing for now. I am running two miles as fast as I can. 

SIXTEEN DAYS OF SILENCE

Sixteen days.

I finished my C25K program....(a.k.a. I ran three miles for the first time in 20 years)....16 days ago. Why does that matter? Well, because up until tonight, I had not run since "that" night. After I finished the C25K training program on May 8th, I caught "something". That something started as a general blah feeling with a tickle in the throat, then became a terrible sore throat and headache, that grew into a full on infection of some sort that needed five days of antibiotics, and ended with a nasty chest cold. YUCK!

I was not up to running for over two weeks! I tried to allow myself time to heal. However, as each day passed, I was feeling disappointed that I was somehow losing the little bit of stamina I had managed to build over the previous 8 weeks. I usually run at night, and each evening I kept thinking, "Tonight. Tonight, I will feel good enough to run." It did not happen soon enough for me. 

So, tonight, with a still lingering minor cough, I went for a run. I thought it might be wise to not push myself too hard, so I only ran for 20 minutes (2 miles)....When I look back at my earlier posts, it is funny that I just wrote "only 2 miles"....hahaha! 

It was a bit tough, but I did it! My lungs felt like they were burning a little, and I coughed up my lungs a couple of times, but it felt good to get a run in. One thing I dread...and hope does not happen....is allowing myself to go back to my previous physical state where running even three minutes seemed impossible.

I like that I can run 2-3 miles now. They are not easy miles, but I can run them. I want to keep it that way and continue to push myself further. Just as there was a time when I could not imagine running for 5 minutes, now I can't imagine running 5 miles, but I know I will get there.

So, after a 16 day set back, I am glad to be back on my "ever so slowly running" feet.

I DID IT! FROM THE COUCH TO A 5K!!!!!

I DID IT!!!!!! I finished the C25K training program! 8 weeks x 3 trainings each week...through cold, wind, heat, and pouring rain...on land and on sea...I made it from my couch to a 5K!!! My first major milestone on my journey to a marathon is COMPLETE!!!!!!